The Ban

So, in this epic origin tale of my artistic journey, I am now a teenager. At this point in my life, I am in boarding school in England. I spent the first year at the school doing all the subjects on the National Curriculum- English (language and literature), history, maths, chemistry, art, drama and dance. I even managed to sustain two injuries- one from a jazz dance class and one from playing field hockey. Now, in the U.K., when you reach year 9, at thirteen or fourteen, you must choose options for the G.C.S.E.s (I guess this would be your high school diploma). I think you would usually take a minimum of nine subjects, which comprise compulsory subjects of English, Maths, Science, and a modern foreign language. Bear in mind, this was in the 90s, so things may have changed (I don’t keep up with the changes in Education in the U.K. anymore!). At my school, I think you had to take two modern foreign languages – one was compulsory (I think it was French) and the other was an option of your choice. So, on top of the compulsory subjects, I had the option of taking three subjects of my choosing and the options available included Dance, Drama and Art.

Remember years prior, as I explained to you in the previous post, I had this incident with my dad, where I was essentially forbidden from entertaining any ideas of becoming an artist. After that incident, my creative outlets were dismissed as hobbies, and I was allowed to pursue them because, to my dad, they seemed benign. I also understood that, under no uncertain terms, was I to pursue anything artistic in any serious or legitimate way. However, my dad paid for me to engage in extra-curricular activities, including piano lessons from ages 8 to 13 years old. I was even allowed to join the school brass band, and my hobbies still included drawing, writing, and even designing jewellery. (Side note: I designed a jewellery collection for my mother, which she eventually made and wore for a long time!)

Back to the story.

I explained the situation to my parents, and my dad said it was fine, but I was not allowed to take any creative subject. Because I know better than to question my parents out loud, in my head, I’m thinking, “Is he serious?” Apparently, he was. Only ‘serious academic’ subjects were to be picked. So, no dance, no drama and no art. So now, the game has changed. My dad explained that I had reached a critical point in my life, and with my G.C.S.E.s fast approaching, it was time to get serious. “I am not paying for you to have piano lessons anymore and I will not pay for any extra-curricular activities because I want you to concentrate on your academic work.”

And for the second time in my very young life, my heart had been crushed again.

I went back, and I submitted my option forms.

However, the school returned and said there was a problem with my option choice – I hadn’t picked any creative subject. I informed them that I wasn’t allowed to (after all, am I the one paying the school fees?), and if possible, could they communicate directly with my dad? (because I knew, even then, that such information coming from me would not be believed and may be seen as an attempt to deceive and get my own way). The school informed my dad that it was the school’s policy (in line with the National Curriculum) that every student takes one artistic subject to give a more “well-rounded education.” My father relented. I could take one creative subject, so I chose art.

Ironically, I didn’t do very well in art, which was my lowest G.C.S.E. grade. However, it was doing art that got me through what was a challenging period of my life- I suffered a bereavement; I was racially bullied; I went through what seemed like extreme hormonal changes, and I now know I am clinically depressed. However, through this subject at school, I discovered Frida Kahlo; I learned about the profound and sublime work of Mark Chagall; discovered Pop Art and found hope, courage and solace in the paintings and story of my favourite artist, Vincent van Gogh.

So you see, I experienced art’s power to unlock doors into transcendence from the every day- enabling me to see beyond my circumstances, no matter how dark they were.

In the next blog post we leap many years forward to yet another critical turning point in my life and my artistic journey.

So, until we gather again, move towards your dream - one step at a time - no matter how small.